The stories we tell ourselves

The stories we tell ourselves dictate the way we live our lives. The decisions we make are based on them. The stories tell other pale into insignificance compared. Would you skip to the end of a movie before watching the rest? or only read the last chapter of a book before deciding whether to read the rest? of course not. Although I went through a stage a few years back of doing just that. If I found the last chapter of a book interesting I would make the decision to read the rest.

It’s scary when you realise you are living your life that way. Human beings are obsessed with endings. How our life will end. If we make one decision how will it end. As a matter of fact we are so concerned with the outcome we forget to live for now. Living in the now is so important. Seeing life like a piece of sheet music that we dance to rather than seeing how the song went down with the audience first.

The stories we tell ourselves


When we self reflect or even reflect on something involving other people in our lives, the whole story counts. Skipping through to the last bit means we miss bits that may seem insignificant. In light of a seemingly small detail could be the turning point of the entire story. Similarly the stories we tell ourselves that’s to say what we see ourselves. They are the most important stories of all. So many of us get to middle age and realise we have been so busy chasing the ending that we have no idea why we choose that particular story in the first place.

When we tell ourselves negative stories about ourselves or our lives it never ends well. In the negative light of these stories we never dance to our own tune. In fact we are more likely to dance to other people’s. If you can’t bear to sing your own song then you will never dance to it. That’s your life!! Changing the story will also change what others here you singing. Music plays a big part in our lives and has more of an effect than we realise. Music with a beat and catchy lyrics gets us all dancing or at least smiling. When we want to reflect and meditate on decisions we need to make it’s quiet music with a slower beat. Music affects our brain waves.

Life is like sheet music

dance to the music of life

So if we all lived our lives like we are writing sheet music and decide on the beat ourselves. We would be much happier. That in turn has a direct effect on those around. It has taken me until middle age to understand that we have to be happy within ourselves to be truly accepted by others and have a positive effect. People pleasing will never make us happy and those around us will also be unhappy. Making any decision would be so much easier if we made them based on our own music. Why would you want to spend YOUR life dancing to a piece of music someone else wrote. If they wrote it for you that’s even worse.

Each day is a new song

Make each day a new song. Your whole life is a concerto. A symphony to be end on a round of standing ovation. The will be days represented by sad songs and others by an inspirational, catchy beat. Times that are best guided by quiet classical symphonies that keep you listening but quiet. Some parts of our lives that are solos and others duets. Whatever you decide about parts of your concerto, you are the composer. You and only you. Remember that when it feels like you are alone. maybe that’s what is meant to be at that time. We all need times of reflection and quiet. Times when the influence of others would only lead us off on the wrong path.